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  • Behold, A Black Horse

    By Oronte September 28, 2007 12:35 pm

    Yep, just as Revelation predicted, on the heels of war comes famine—the strange self-chosen famine of the overfed society—announced by a black horse the size of an apartment building . It nearly ran me down on a tiny street at campus center, when its driver struggled to park the beast at the curb.

    There’s not much to be said here about Playboy's promo bus that doesn’t spring instantly and obviously to mind. This “energy drink” thing is all the rage on campuses, and while students admit the drinks “taste like ass,” they’re using them as mock-amphetamines (sometimes in conjunction with real ones) and mixing them half-and-half with vodka, for everything from all-night study sessions to promotion of “social confidence."

    The good news is you too can become an energy drink purveyor, with a little help from people like this. (My friend Crazy Larry is out of luck; somebody beat him to market.)

    All I need is a name for my new line. What’ll it be? Churm Juice? Uncertain Fluids, From Oronte Churm? Oozin’ Churm?

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Comments on Behold, A Black Horse

  • Posted by Ikeboy on September 28, 2007 at 1:35pm EDT
  • Churm Slurm, with all appropriate props to Futurama.

  • Posted by Oronte on September 29, 2007 at 5:15am EDT
  • The tagline for my Slurm will be, "Catch a dose of Churm tonight!"

  • Yuck
  • Posted by Rory on September 29, 2007 at 5:20am EDT
  • Churm sauce.