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The academic year begins for college students and their parents (essay)

Welcome to the University
August 31, 2012

www.studentforum.edu

www.parentforum.edu

Hi, I just wanted to say I got my housing today, and apparently I am in a triple upgraded single all the way in North Campus, which is like sticking three people in a shower stall in Finland, and… like… I didn’t even know such a thing existed.  I feel like this has to be a human rights violation or something
–Lauren ‘16

 

 

Hello, there.  I’m a parent of an incoming frosh and she has just received her housing assignment to something called a TUS -- triple upgraded single -- and she is none too happy about it.

Can someone out there help me put a positive spin on this?
–Jane P’16

The first thing you need to do is chill. Maybe it’s a little intimate but clearly you’ll be hosting all the pregames in your hall… and if you don’t like one roommate there is always the other.  Hopefully both of them won’t sexile you LOL. PS if you need to chill, hit me up. Even you frosh know what I mean.
–Evan ‘15

 

 

Yes, my daughter got assigned to one of these three years ago when she was a frosh and I have to say she loved every minute of it.  Definitely bring a coat tree. And bone up on your texting skills, because there’s zero privacy for her to take phone calls! But she got a 4.0 her first semester and now she’s president of her sorority and just completing an internship at a major think tank in DC.  So it definitely worked out for her and she could not be happier. We are so proud of her and this school is worth every penny.
–Anne P’13

Hey, I got assigned to one of those, too.  Are you my roommate by any chance?  I’ve already bought the microwave/fridge package so you owe me like fifty bucks and I prefer cash so just give it to me the first day. Do you like Amy Winehouse? I love her music but then I read her dad’s book and it made me really sad. –Julie ‘16

 

 

My son did not get assigned to one of those but from what I understand they are not uncommon and by no means a reflection on the university’s national ranking, which as you know is extremely high.

Anyway Graydon was a National Merit Scholar and got a single right away and has never had a problem with anything and has been constantly surrounded by supportive people. Education is what you make of it and he is certainly that guy.  

But by no means should anyone always get whatever they want so this is a good experience for your child and she can learn from it.  No different than it was when I was there. Although sometimes I think that everything I learned in college I learned from my a cappella group. Four part harmonizing under the arches, arranging “Some Girls” WITH a beatboxer… we were rebels! Welcome to the university!
–Becky ’83, P’14

Hello there class of 2016! I’m the director of Residential Life at the university. I know you’re all very excited about housing assignments being released, but I’d just like to remind you to not post your room numbers on the board, as they should be treated as private and confidential.
–Amanda Z, Director of Residential Life

 

 

What I want parents on this board to understand is not everyone’s college experience is perfect and some people really do need our help and advice and could you all stop using this as an opportunity to gloat about your kids?  I mean, really. That said, please do count us among the happiest of this university’s families! Not a single regret from us. What’s a third mortgage anyway?
–Grace P’15

Omggg cutest cats ever http://youtube.com/9374923749237 am I right, 2016ers?
–Brian ‘13

 

 

As a college professor/freshman adviser at another school myself, I can also tell you that our family is INSANELY happy with our son’s experience thus far. Brian is just in love with the place, so much so that he
has sacrificed participating in the sacred university tradition of senior-exclusive housing to place himself in the thick of the freshmen as an RA.
--Bonnie, P ‘14

LOLOL did you see Brian trolling the frosh? But seriously, don’t fall asleep on the common area couches, okay?  Even if you’re sexiled by your roommate the heroin addict whose boyfriend moved in.
–Sort of Anonymous ‘13

 

 

I don’t know whether this board is open to grandparents or not, but here I am, just like I am in my son-in-law’s house. I put up the money for that educational trust fund anyway. In my opinion if you pay
a gazillion dollars for education then a single should be a single and a double should be a double and a goddamn triple should be a triple. And a man is a man and a woman is a woman and did you know that the University has the highest percentage of transgendered alumni of the top 50?
—Milton GP ‘14

Look, everyone knows who you are so I don’t know why you bother with the anon. Just cuz of whatever happened while you were asleep or whatever don’t freak out the frosh. They sound like the stupidest freshman class ever. Also, do you still want to buy my bike? Sixty bucks. Text me.
—Amanda ‘13

 

 

Dear Parents, this is a reminder that the work-study allotment is a maximum. Once your child reaches their allotted amount, they will not get paid beyond that. They can, however, continue to work for the university on a volunteer basis!
--Jason F., Director of Financial Aid

Does anybody know what the deal with work-study is? My aid package said I should make $1,500 per semester but the job I want only pays $400 and that’s with working 15 hours a week! I guess I should try to get three jobs? When will I have time to study? Then again, I didn’t get into any of the classes I wanted… so I guess studying might not be an issue.
--Elaine, ‘16

 

 

Work study is what you make of it, right?  It’s a privilege not a right! It’s all who you know, so buy cupcakes for the admin assistant or be BFFs with the senior who will be leaving that work-study job soon!! Binky’s Cupcakes on Main St. delivers.
--Celia, ‘P14

Having trouble getting into all the courses you want? Worried about the workload? The university has the answer for you: the six-year degree program! Why take four courses per semester when you could take three and minimize your stress? Leave the financials to your parents, and register for your favorite three classes! Remember to still list the max twelve on the enrollment form to enhance your chances of getting into any of them.
--The Office of Academic Affairs

 

 

I thought this board was monitored!
--Andrea, P ‘15

Dudes my mom is like flipping because we live in Minnesota and what’s the best flight route and are there taxis from Amtrak and junk. So can some of you cool upperclassmen pls advise before we run out of Xanax?
--Ethan, ‘16

 

 

So I am wondering what the best way is to get my son from the airport to the university. Is there a campus shuttle service? Also I am considering renting a short-term apartment nearby so I can help him get settled -- does anyone know how I could go about this?
--Helen, P'16

Well, my plane just touched down from Darfur, where I was part of a university president committee reviewing that region’s abysmal record of human rights abuse, and I see that you all are already involved in our school’s deservedly legendary exercise of free speech on each of our open boards.  Have a great summer, everyone!
--The Prez, ’76 (I can’t believe it’s been forty years since I was a freshman myself!)

 

 

Empty nest, eh Helen?  All I can say from my own child’s experience is that whatever you do make sure you let your kid handle it himself. Otherwise, like Becky says, how can you ever expect your child to learn anything!
--Mark P’14

 

Bio

Fred Leebron is a professor of English at Gettysburg College and author of several novels. Cade Leebron is a college student. Kathryn Rhett is an associate professor of English at Gettysburg and author of the memoir Near Breathing.

 

 

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