Archives for Mama PhD

Amen to that

Wow. The voice of experience. From someone else who “had a plan,” I cannot but completely endorse everything you so candidly laid out.

I can only laugh, shake my head, and muse about all the places I intended to go, where I actually (and never dreamed I) went, and how it all worked itself out. I am not a cabinet secretary, as I had sort of planned, but I’m in higher education administration and providing a daily role model for my three strong, smart, silly daughters that if you want something—then go get it. No one but you will stand in your way. It is a darn good idea to lay out your “plan” to the significant other in your life so that know what they’re getting themselves in for. My husband, like the writer’s, bought into my career/mommy track plans, which is critical for your communication as a couple at the outset. That’s the best unvarnished piece of advice (along with everything else she said) in the piece.

Live your life; it may turn out somewhat like you planned, but if it does, you probably didn’t learn much. That’s why the rollercoaster is the best ride at the park.

Sista from anotha motha, at 12:55 pm EST on November 24, 2008

When to have a child

Many of the women academics I coach wonder whether they should plan for the ‘perfect’ time to have a child. In terms of a career, there is no ‘perfect’ time but combining a career with motherhood is always possible.

Mary McKinney, Academic Coach at Successful Academic Consulting, at 7:55 am EST on December 1, 2008

Work Schedules

Thanks for the insight into your work schedule. I’m a regular reader of this blog, as well as any study that gets reported on IH about motherhood in the academy. Most are pretty depressing, especially the ones that indicate that women doctors and even attorneys are having more children that women academics. (I’m a career changer from law who now is wondering why she traded out one set of frustrations for another.)

I was thinking it might be helpful to hear more about work schedules. I know there is nothing like an “average” day in academia, but I was relieved to hear that a 12-hour day was an anomaly, and that an 8-5 schedule was more typical (with grading on the side, anything else? what about weekend commitments?).

I wonder if the other mother-academics on this blog might be willing to say more concretely about how their days play out. Thanks much for your courage, and for your willingness to share your experiences and insights — it means a lot to this fan.

Pondering Motherhood & Career, at 10:30 am EST on November 25, 2008

being a mom

You are parenting full time! You’re a parent and even though you might not be at home all the time, you are a full-time parent and a full-time biologist. You’ve done it all. No one has the perfect mix.

balancing, at 9:25 pm EST on December 1, 2008

I look forward to the “more-on-that-next-week” segment.

Thanks!

Paige, at 10:05 am EST on December 1, 2008

I think I built my own lattice by leaving academia... I do know someone who earned her PhD, moved into non-academic work for a couple years, and is now adjuncting and going on the market for more steady work. So I’m interested to see if she can build a lattice back — or if she gives it up for the academic ladder.

Caroline, Coeditor, Mama, PhD, at 12:31 pm EST on December 2, 2008

“In 2004, 68% of American higher education faculty had contingent (non-tenure track) appointments, up remarkably from 1975, when 43% of faculty hires were non-tenure track. Similarly, the percentage of part time faculty has gone up – from 30% in 1979 to 48% in 2004.”

And you know how much they are paying most of those non-tenure track employees? Most of those non-tenure track employees are adjuncts, not lecturers. They get paid between $2-3,000 per class. The University of Tennessee has their adjuncts teaching 5/5 schedules and pays them $15,000. How many of those adjuncts go on to get proper t-t jobs? Not many. The adjunct route is pure and simple exploitation.

laura, at 6:55 pm EST on December 3, 2008

Thank you!

I greatly appreciate this blogger taking the time to share her story and experiences. As a tenure track faculty member, non-custodial, divorced mother of a daughter who is now nine and a half, I know first hand the emotional strain and academic anxiety that accompanies such “long distance love.” For four years, I was able to work and/or live in the same city that my daughter and her father reside in and we split weeks with our daughter; coincidentially we also lived in subdivisions that were across the street from each other at one point. Four years ago, I took a position in another city, same state but still two+ hours away. Since then, I’ve gone down to only seeing her every other weekend and half the summer and call once a week and correspond through postal mail as she remembers to write me back. I still haven’t fully resolved the guilt I feel for my choice and the anxiety that I still don’t spend enough time on my scholarship to earn tenure. I’m tired of people at my current institution asking me what school my daughter attends when they learn I am a parent and having to respond that she lives in another city and then dealing with the puzzled expression on their face that inevitably follows.

Every time I look in her empty bedroom between her visits, my heart sinks. Every time. I look forward to following these entries on long distance love to hopefully gain some strategies to resolve my guilt and deal with the emotional toll of being separated from my daughter.

DocStewart, at 10:01 am EST on December 4, 2008

Love, Academic Style

These ladies who spoke about love, academic style, have hit a nerve with me. I am currently in a similar position. I am a new faculty, also on a tenure track. After a long battle, crying and discussion, my family decided on a move this fall (just after my graduation) but of course my house and my husband are still back in my home state, and the kids and I are in my job state. They miss their friends,their home, and of course their dad. He comes to see us once per month but take “leave” without pay. So that doesn’t help us financially with a mortgage and rent to pay while we await the sale of our house. Whenever he goes back the kids would cry (especially the younger one.)I find it hard to focus on writing, and the kids are obvously unhappy. After much deliberation, we’ve decided to move back home and I do the commute since I am more flexible with teaching schedule etc, but of course my anxiety level is very high right now with an 11 and a 14 year old. I am worried what’s going to happen in spring. They will move back to their old schools,and thier rooms so that is a blessing of some familiarity and my mom will help when I am away. We believe that the new arrangement will be better for us finacially and the kids will feel a sense of security and stability that they do not currently have (they absolutely hate being here.) But all this doesn’t negate the guilt I felt having taking them away from their home, dad, and friends at the beginning of this fall. Not to mention that their sense of stability have been eroded. But what should we as moms in academia do? Should we simply throw in the towel? Not advance our careers? Are we being selfish when we try to advance in this “business?” These are some of the questions I find I think about a lot. I worked so hard for the Ph.D. now I have to work even harder to keep my family together, secure, and happy. HELP needed!!!

Sandy, Assistant professor at Texas State University, at 1:55 pm EST on December 5, 2008

Thank you

Wonderful post. Super insights. I am thankful for all those who took the extra steps when I was a student and try (in my own feeble ways) to do the same with those I encounter on my campus.

Ohio Dad, at 8:45 am EST on December 5, 2008

andecdotal evidence

When I saw those stats in the Chronicle, anecdotal evidence made me wonder if the women-with-tenure-and-children numbers weren’t a bit misleading. I know two tenured academic women with children, but both left their families on one side of the country and commute back and forth from their academic posts on the other. Sure, they are women, tenured, and they have children. But that’s not something I’ve ever heard of men doing. Surely my “evidence” is skewed, but still, I wonder about the sacrifices made by this small percentage of academic women with children.

Dina, at 2:00 pm EST on December 8, 2008

As an aspiring mama Phd myself, I’m just beginning my journey for my Phd which has been delayed for, among various reasons, my son to enter first grade. I was pregnant with him while I was getting my Master’s and a graduate assistant. While most of my professors, if not accommodating, were supportive during my pregnancy, others were openly disparaging with one female professor openly remarking that if I were truly a serious scholar I wouldn’t have had children and would have devoted my time to my academic pursuits.

I have sacrificed much to pursue my academic goals, including joining the Navy and going to war. I find more support for being a war vet pursuing an education than for being a mother pursuing an education. I understood that I would have to juggle motherhood and a career no matter what my chosen profession. I don’t mind climbing a lattice, but I didn’t expect to have to build the lattice first. My hope is that my daughter will be able to climb a lattice that is already there.

Tracy, at 9:40 am EST on December 10, 2008