May 5

The Career Counselor Is In: Advice From 'The Other Side'

By Megan Pincus Kajitani

Editor’s Note: Megan Pincus Kajitani will be answering your career transition questions here each Monday. Read on, and send your questions to mamaphd@insidehighered.com

I struck up a conversation recently with a woman who works as a consultant at my hair salon — turns out she has a Ph.D. in psychology. I drove by a van a few months ago with the logo Ph.D. Plumbing. And I read a great health article in a magazine last week, where in the writer’s bio she calls herself a “Ph.D. dropout” (she has a Master’s in biology).

Now, many academics may think, “Gasp! How awful for these poor people!” But, I see a very different picture. I see individuals who were on the academic path and changed course. Not a judgment, just a fact.

And since roughly 50% of people who start doctoral programs finish them, and an only slightly larger percentage of Ph.D.’s become tenured professors, there are actually more former doctoral students on “the other side” of traditional academia than there are still in it. Contrary to some misguided beliefs, by the way, almost all of us who exit do so not because we aren’t doing well enough, but because we just realize we want to do something different (thanks to Barbara Lovitts for doing the research that backs this up).

People change course in their careers all the time. In fact, labor statistics show that Americans today change careers on average around three times in their working lives (and jobs 10.5 times).

Still, I understand that in academia, the thought of leaving the tenure-driven fold is terrifying, humiliating, even shameful. I was inside, too. I know how it works. I was a doctoral student, a Javits fellow no less, from an academic family. And my erstwhile advisor never spoke to me again after I decided four years in to change course.

Ironically, what I changed to was a full-time position as a career counselor for graduate students at my research university. And after many tear-filled nights before taking the plunge those several years ago now, I quickly realized I had no regrets. I loved the job; it suited me and I felt like I was making a difference. (And I saw clearly who my real friends were.)

I also got the great gift of seeing that my own anguish in leaving the professor path was far from unique. Doctoral students with similar quandaries flooded my office (including several from my own Ph.D. program – who, of course, never uttered a word of their dissatisfaction when we sat in graduate seminars together).

Many, like me, wanted to have families, to choose where they live, and other crazy notions that don’t always jive with life in the professorate (obviously, they sometimes do jive, but there’d be no Mama, Ph.D. book, including many angst-filled stories, if this combination was accomplished effortlessly). I wasn’t alone after all, as so many graduate students feel they are.

As a university career counselor, I co-created (with a campus psychologist) a five-session workshop for doctoral students called “Questioning Career Transition.” I helped with career decisions, interview skills, résumés, and alternative career research. I listened, commiserated, referred and advised.

Now, I freelance (mostly as a writer/editor, my pre-academic career), and I mother. Another transition and, again, after more difficult decision-making, I landed where I want to be. You can read my whole story in our anthology, Mama, Ph.D.

And, now, thanks to Inside Higher Ed, you can send me your own career transition questions here, and I’ll answer one here each Monday.

Anything on your mind about careers on “the other side,” or how to get there, please ask. I can recommend career resources, offer insights and tips, and lend support. (And, don’t worry, I’ll have no problem steering you in whatever direction is right for you – for some it’s to the tenure track, for others it is nearly anywhere else.)

Plus, this being a blog and all, other readers can share their own thoughts on your questions, and my answers, and hopefully we can have some important and helpful conversations about careers, transitions and all that goes with them.

Fire away – I look forward to hearing from you!

Comments

Megan, I just wanted to say that I’m thrilled you’ll be writing this blog for us! I look forward to all of your sage advice. :)

Elrena, Coeditor at Mama, PhD, at 8:30 am EDT on May 6, 2008

I was a member of the first class of women to graduate from Dartmouth College and in that capacity traveled to San Francisco last weekend to celebrate with other alumnae the 35th anniversary of when we pioneers first stepped on campus as members of the community. There were panels of alumnae describing their careers in business, technology, education, the arts; others talked about politics, service, and “the road less traveled.”

One classmate who had dedicated herself to the once-traditional and honored role of mother and homemaker told me she wanted to pull the covers over her head and stay in bed the next morning, so diminished did she feel in comparing her accomplishments to her fellow alumnae. I had wondered whether the trend of more recent grads of top colleges to pocket their diplomas and plunge straight into marriage and family would be reflected in this group, but I think those who chose that route stayed clear of the conference, probably fearing that their choice would not be honored and celebrated.

There were frank discussions of ageism and sexism, the frustrations of balancing career and family (especially with two working parents), but little talk about the multiphase career that can offer a good solution to both the fluctuating stresses of different periods of life and to the boredom that finally afflicts many, despite the successes they have wracked up. That strategy is particularly useful for women, but something that all workers should learn to deploy, as your stat of three careers, ten-plus jobs suggests. Hope you’ll focus on that subject, as solution.

Tish O’Connor, at 8:30 pm EDT on May 6, 2008

Dartmouth women are so intelligent!

Hi everyone,

I came over to support Megan and say, you go girl, or some such thing, and found myself commenting right under a fellow Dartmouth Alumna. I was really glad, even though I did not make it to the S.F. event that Dartmouth is starting to have events specifically honoring women. I am a latecomer to motherhood and have chosen to have one child, but I can definitely imagine the chagrin your friend was experiencing. Ivy Leaguers tend to be a fairly over-achieving bunch and I am a late bloomer, in many regards, so I imagine I would have also felt somewhat self-conscious.

Megan, isn’t that all really part of not feeling like enough? (Another topic that I know you know a lot about.) And how is that more or less of an issue for women who are educated and achievement oriented?

Christina Katz, The Writer Mama, at 10:30 pm EDT on May 7, 2008

Amen to Chapters!

Thanks so much for your comments, Tish and Christina!

I was just talking to the Mama, PhD co-editor Elrena Evans yesterday about the idea of “having it all” but not “having it all at once.”

Miriam Peskowitz says it so well (and has the research to prove it) in “The Truth Behind the Mommy Wars” — most women (and men) want to be able to have phases of career and family, part-time work options when they are in the heavy parenting years and re-entry options if they leave for a time — not feel constantly torn, judged and unsupported because they can’t give 100% to both work and family at all times from age 25-55.

I focus on the idea of “Having Enough” in my current work because I really am saddened at the anguish I see so many “overachievers” going through as they beat themselves up for not reaching the highest point, at the earliest time, doing it all, etc. This is why Harvard started their “Success-Failure Project” and why Alexandra Robbins wrote “The Overachievers” — the epidemic of educated people feeling a constant lacking/failure must be addressed, both personally and societally.

My goal here will be to help people get the resources they need to choose the best path for themselves, and get there with perhaps a little less anguish because of the support they find here. And I already know from experience that, for most of us, that path is a winding one (with on-ramps and off-ramps, as Sylvia Ann Hewlett wisely supports!)!

Megan Pincus Kajitani, at 5:00 am EDT on May 8, 2008

Megan, I want to compliment you for the work you are doing. I always knew you would go the extra mile to bring these messages to others who may be comtemplating the Ph.D. vs. family dilemma. You did an outstanding job as a career counselor and as one of your colleagues, I can honestly say we were extremely fortunate to have you. I’m confident you will do well with this blog as well as with the various other articles you will be writing. Carry on, my friend, there are many out there who are in desperate need of your message.

Take care.

Bobbie

Bobbie Gray, Career Counselor at San Diego State University, at 1:20 pm EDT on May 8, 2008