In which a veteran of cultural studies seminars in the 1990s moves into academic administration and finds himself a married suburban father of two. Foucault, plus lawn care.
The Girl is in training to be Supreme Ruler of the Earth.
She has already conquered the opposite sex. One of the boys in her nursery school class – I'll call him Millhaus – has taken quite a shine to TG. We got a call from Millhaus' Mom saying that every day when he gets home, it's TG this and TG that, and would we like to set up a playdate?
TG's first date.
The Wife asked TG if she knew Millhaus. TG's response: “Who?”
After all these years, it's nice to be on the other side of that one.
I suspected that Millhaus' Mom might have been embellishing a little, in order to fob off her kid for a little while. I was wrong.
On Saturday, TW took The Girl to the local library for the children's story hour. Apparently, Millhaus was there. He started jumping up and down wildly, pointing, and screaming “It's TG! Look! Mom! It's TG!”
TG was unimpressed. Though she did allow herself an enigmatic smile when I asked her later if she liked Millhaus.
But it doesn't stop there. She's also breaking down gender barriers.
For Halloween, TG declared that she would be Little Red Riding Hood, and that I would accompany her as The Big Bad Wolf. (The Boy is going as a basketball player.) Today TG amended her position slightly, allowing me to the The Big Good Wolf, so as not to scare anybody. TW found her a great Little Red Riding Hood costume on Ebay, so we're ready.
But she also likes to play dressup throughout the year, and the weeks before Halloween are the best time to find dressup material for the next several months.
TW had to do some shopping anyway, so while at Target she checked out the kids' costumes.
Apparently, Target does some pretty heavy-handed gender segregation of kids' costumes. The girls' aisle was all princesses and fairies. The boys' aisle had all the actual jobs. TW declared loudly “why is the doctor costume only in the boys' aisle?” to which a nearby Mom said “yeah!” TW bought the costume – scrubs, basically, plus a stethoscope – and brought it home for TG. TG loves it, insisting on wearing it even as we raked leaves in the backyard. And I'll admit, she's a natural. She has the attention span of a scientist, and the backbone of a pioneer. I wouldn't bet against her.
She's a real life Lisa Simpson, only, I hope, with a better Dad.
Readers, consider yourselves warned. One day she will be Supreme Ruler of the Earth. You knew her when...