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1. Low boredom threshold
“The book was the worst…no just the first couple of pages. I skimmed a summary on wikipedia for the rest….what do you mean, she dies in the end? I didn’t get that at all! Oh well I already wrote my paper – I’m not going back and re-doing it now.”
2. Lack of follow through
“The thing is I really meant to be there, I just didn’t wake up. No I have an alarm. I just slept through it.”
3. Splintered focus
“My mom is always on me about being ‘focused’. Like tonight. I’m writing a paper, checking my ex-boyfriend’s status on facebook, replying to a text on my chocolate, uploading new music to my ipod and im-ing to two different people. Clearly I’m focused – it’s not like the TV is on!”
4. Boasting about things that should embarrass them
“I totally bullsh-tted my way through that discussion, I never read the essays.”
“Me neither. You can do that in most classes if you just listen to the first people that talk and then just re-phrase what they said.”
“My friend said he graduated without ever finishing an entire book.”
“Oh cr-p, I have a paper due tomorrow – no big deal. I’ll write after lunch tomorrow – the class isn’t until 1.”
5. All or nothing mentality (the if you don’t really try you don’t really fail thing)
“I just couldn’t get it done well so I didn’t write it at all. I’m a perfectionist.”
6. Codependency
What r u doin?
in class. U?
me 2. how’s it going?
Not sure.
Me neither. U need a haircut.
Can you see it from where you are sitting?
Yeah. You want to go to wendy’s 4 lunch?
7. Helicopter Parents
Beep.
“Hello? This is Tim Smith’s mother. I wanted to speak with you regarding his final grade in the class. I’ve discussed it with my husband and we just don’t think that a B is really fair. I mean the amount of reading you expect these students to do in one semester is completely over the top. Please call me right away. “
8. Questionable taste in clothing
Well – actually I can’t mock them there. The 80’s are back in fashion. We were all questionable once….