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December 07, 2024

Just the Facts of a Presidency

You cannot make this stuff up. Seriously. You just can’t.

By  Rachel Toor

The Sandbox

Inside Higher Ed Insider
Image of masks

From Rachel Toor

Yesterday was the anniversary of the Dec. 6 congressional hearings. The sister presidents are still suffering, and many others, including male presidents, are still getting credible threats of violence. One former president said, “It’s a life-shortening job.”

As we ready ourselves for the new shitshow administration, let’s remember that even in the relatively tolerant space of U.S. higher ed, we still have a long way to go in terms of how we treat those in leadership roles.

Though they may pale in comparison to attacks from outside, the aggression and slights that come from people within our campus walls aren’t helping extend the life expectancy of presidencies.

Let us know what more we can do to support those willing to step into the role or email me if you just need to vent. What follows is one president’s list poem of a career’s worth of slings and arrows.

The writer is a current president.
 
Thirteen Years of Looking at a Presidency
            (Thanks to Wallace Stevens)

“I do not know which to prefer,
The beauty of inflections
Or the beauty of innuendoes,
The blackbird whistling
Or just after.”
 
      The Charges 
 
  • Accused of acting like a president
  • Accused of getting along too well with administrators
  • Accused of following governance
  • Accused of not following governance
  • Accused of not following campus master plan
  • Accused of following campus master plan
  • Accused of creating a financial crisis (there wasn’t a crisis)
  • Accused of running too high a budgetary surplus
  • Accused of too high tenure standards
  • Accused of inadequate process
  • Accused of not being inclusive enough
  • Accused of installing security cameras after the community asked for additional security
  • Accused of being hired due to race
  • Accused of being a bad parent 
  • Accused of being a fundraiser 
  • Accused of having nice shoes
  • Accused of being mean to vermin infesting campus
     
    The Threats
     
  • Death threats (2)
  • Threats of physical harm (2) (“they will get you in a small room and won’t let you out” and “this place will look like Columbine and Virginia Tech”)
  • Threats to destroy professional future (many)
  • Stalker (years) 
  • Permanent restraining order (1)
  • Family member confronted by employee brandishing a large knife offering to “slit your throat” (1)
  • Other threats to family (so many, so scary)

    The Scrutiny
     
  • Questions about name, age, and address of partner, financial status of partner, location during weekends
  • Colors hair (no)
  • Facelift (no)
  • Too tall
  • Too thin
  • Gained weight 
  • Overheard swearing in the president’s house 
  • Criticized for work done on the president’s house after the city threatened to pull occupancy permits due to decrepit state
  • Individuals discovered looking through medicine cabinet on the second floor during holiday party at president’s house

    Plus
     
  • A bad dancer
  • An unenthusiastic composter
  • Unsympathetic to naked students 
  • Moralistic
  • A bad driver
  • Vastly overpaid

    Some Additional Facts 
 
  • Board member saying, “Groping’s back in, you better watch out” (1)
  • Lingerie received from donor (and returned) (1)
  • Donor who requested hand-holding while walking to restaurant (1)
  • Times told, “You don’t look like a president” (too many to mention)
  • Total years as president (15+)
  • Dollars raised ($250 million+)
  • Salary compared to men in same position (20% less)
 

“The river is moving. 
The blackbird must be flying.”

If you want to get this email, please become a member

The Sandbox makes visible the challenges experienced by presidents and chancellors; we provide an outlet for them to write freely and anonymously. However, readership is open to anyone. Email me if you have questions.

Harry, a black and white dog with magnificent ears
JOIN TODAY

 

The Sandbox

Not your typical weekly newsletter. This is a space where presidents and chancellors can say what they really think without fear. Everyone is welcome to read, but only those who have been in the top job can submit to us. The Sandbox, by Rachel Toor, is an exclusive benefit of our paid Insider membership program.

 

 

The Sandbox Archive

The Real Text Messages of Lady Presidents

September 19, 2026

Retreat Rights

September 12, 2026

What Does a College Student Look Like?

August 29, 2026

Wackadoodle Newsletter Turns 3

August 22, 2026

Presidents: Quit Yer Whining

August 15, 2026
View All
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